Honoring Memorial Day: Reflecting on Our LGBTQ Heroes

As we gather this Memorial Day to honor the brave individuals who have served and sacrificed in the armed forces, it is essential to remember the diverse tapestry of those who have worn the uniform, including the LGBTQ+ members who often served in silence and faced unique challenges. This day, while solemn, provides an opportunity to recognize not only the valor of all service members but also the specific struggles and contributions of LGBTQ+ individuals in the military.

A History of Silence and Strength

The military’s relationship with LGBTQ+ service members has been complex and fraught with challenges. Before 1982, the military did not have an explicit policy banning gay men and lesbians, but same-sex relations were criminalized and could lead to discharge. The early 1940s saw homosexuality classified as a mental illness, effectively barring LGBTQ+ individuals from service and stigmatizing those who were already serving.

Despite these obstacles, countless LGBTQ+ individuals served their country with distinction, their contributions often going unrecognized. They performed their duties while hiding their true selves, driven by the same sense of duty and patriotism as their heterosexual counterparts.

“Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell”: A Double-Edged Sword

In 1993, the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” (DADT) policy was enacted, representing a complicated step forward. On one hand, it allowed closeted LGBTQ+ individuals to serve without fear of being asked about their sexual orientation. On the other hand, it mandated that they could be discharged for disclosing it, effectively forcing them into silence. The policy was meant to be a compromise, but in reality, it perpetuated a climate of fear and repression.

Under DADT, over 13,000 service members were discharged for being openly LGBTQ+. The policy affected their careers and took a psychological toll, as they had to constantly guard their true identities, forming a barrier to camaraderie and trust within their units. The mental health impact was significant, leading to increased stress, anxiety, and isolation among LGBTQ+ service members.

Repeal and Progress

The repeal of DADT in 2011 marked a pivotal moment in the fight for equality within the armed forces. It allowed gay, lesbian, and bisexual individuals to serve openly, bringing an end to the era of sanctioned silence. Following this, in 2013, spousal and family benefits were extended to same-sex married partners, further solidifying the recognition of LGBTQ+ service members and their families.

Another significant milestone came in 2021 when the ban on transgender individuals was rescinded, allowing those who don’t identify with their biological gender to enlist and serve openly. This progressive change acknowledged the diverse identities of service members and their right to serve without hiding who they are.

Remembering All Who Served

This Memorial Day, as we pay tribute to those who have given their lives in service, we also honor the LGBTQ+ individuals who served, often without the acknowledgment they deserved. Their legacy is one of resilience, bravery, and a steadfast commitment to their country despite institutional barriers and societal prejudice.

In remembering their sacrifices, we also recognize the ongoing journey towards full equality and inclusion in the military. Repealing discriminatory policies and extending benefits to all service members are steps in the right direction, but the fight for complete acceptance and support continues.

Moving Forward

As we move forward, creating an environment in the military that accepts and celebrates diversity is crucial. By fostering an inclusive culture, we honor the true spirit of service and ensure that all willing to serve their country can do so with pride and dignity.

Let us also strive for peace above all else, using our military resources to protect the innocent and to protect our values of freedom and democracy, even when we ourselves aren’t fully living into it. This Memorial Day, let’s reflect on the progress we’ve made and commit to continuing the work necessary to support and uplift our LGBTQ+ service members. Their courage and dedication are integral to the fabric of our nation’s military history, and their stories deserve to be told and remembered. May our military be a force for peace and prosperity, protecting those who need hope and upholding the values and freedoms that we hold dear.

By: Rev. Harold Marrero
Chief Operating Officer


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Historical Resources